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Pretty Fly For A Magi
Agarpalooza continues with another work of art. The decline of thaumaturgy has inspired this latest work, dedicated to all you spell-poppin', mob-moppin' warlocks out there! You know who you are! To the Offspring's "Pretty Fly For a White Guy" Brutos, limbras, physca, mentati. Give it to me baby. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Give it to me baby. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Give it to me baby. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And all the girls say I'm pretty fly For a magi. Uno, dos, tres, quatro, cinco, cinco, seis. You know it's kind of hard Just to get along today. Our subject isn't cool 'Cause he studied too much fey. Socially he has no clue, His robes, they lack style. But when he starts spellcasting, All the girlies coo and smile! So don't debate, or be filled with mage hate, Or you may find a nasty blizzard come your way! On the battlefield, he don't use sword or shield, On you no way! On you no way! With a lightning storm, or a meteor swarm, Or with hold monster make you look like a stone form! If he says 'Incerti' Then (HEY HEY) that's the burning thing! Give it to me baby. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Give it to me baby. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Give it to me baby. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And all the girls say I'm pretty fly For a magi. He has got some cool gear He had to work hard just to get. He's got a freaky familiar That is his servant and his pet. Now if he teles to you, it's best to let him pass 'Cause if it strikes his fancy Then he'll shatter you like glass! So don't debate, or be filled with mage hate, Or you may find a nasty blizzard come your way! On the battlefield, he don't use sword or shield, On you no way! On you no way! With a lightning storm, or a meteor swarm, Or with hold monster make you look like a stone form! If he says 'Incerti' Then (HEY HEY) that's the burning thing! In his magical tattoos Are all his wards spun. Energy bolts fly from him Like bullets from a gun. Some people say it's too hard, To make a decent mage, And they stick with their healers In this day and age! Give it to me baby. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Give it to me baby. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Give it to me baby. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And all the girls say I'm pretty fly For a magi. So don't debate, or be filled with mage hate, Or you may find a nasty blizzard come your way! On the battlefield, he don't use sword or shield, On you no way! On you no way! With a lightning storm, or a meteor swarm, Or with hold monster make you look like a stone form! If he says 'Incerti' Then (HEY HEY) that's the burning thing! Go now and feel the power of the Weave flow through you! Be the mage! The wise of you already know! The rest of you, catch up! The Grateful Red